


Sharp Dressed Man

by SeiryuNoHoushi



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Background Jane&Aradia, Background Spades&Droog, Diary/Journal, M/M, Well-Dressed Men, cute fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-18
Updated: 2014-11-18
Packaged: 2018-02-26 03:14:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2635955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeiryuNoHoushi/pseuds/SeiryuNoHoushi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Droog starts up a journal that ends up detailing his dating life once he meets a certain well-dressed dad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sharp Dressed Man

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally from Homestuck Shipping World Cup 2013, but I noticed it was missing from my collection! Oops!

February 23rd, 2009

Slick says I talk too much. What the fuck does that guy know anyways? It’s not like he’s my boss or anything. Since he likes to feed me a load of bullshit about how I yap his ear off, I’ve decided to start writing stuff down. Still, I guess if things get desperate I can try confiding in Deuce. Yeah right. Like I’d do that. He and Hearts aren’t any better than talking to brick walls. 

Got a big date tonight. Met him through Serious Business. Sounds like a classy guy. Here’s hoping for the best.

February 27th, 2009

Fuck. Forgot all about writing down how the date went. Ended up talking to Slick about it - guy threatened to stab me if I didn’t shut up. Typical Slick. Bet his kid is gonna be traumatized all to hell.

Anyways, that’s not what I wanted to talk about. Mr. Pipefan413? Dressed to the 9’s and pretty damn hot to boot. Turns out we got more in common than I thought at first. He’s got a teenage daughter, too. Wonder if Aradia knows her? Ah, who the fuck am I kidding. Kid’s got her nose so far into those history books she wouldn’t notice another kid if they smacked her upside the head. That’s my girl.

March 2nd, 2009

Apparently, Droog has still got it. Got a message today asking to meet for drinks after work. How could I refuse any man that wears a fedora so well? 

\---

He baked me a fucking cake. Who the hell does that on a second date? Normally, that kinda thing doesn’t work with me… But how the hell did he know about my weakness for Swedish fish? It’s like the man is a goddamn mind reader or something. Whole thing was decked in ‘em. 

March 10th, 2009

Met the little lady last night, struck up some small talk with her while I waited on her dad. Seems like a nice kid – into hard-boiled detective stories. I can dig that. We talked about film noir, old black and whites where men were men and dames were class acts. I think we could get along. Can’t fault her tastes so far.

March 17th, 2009

Fucking party. Why the hell does Snowman gotta be like that? Better yet, what does Slick see in her? She’s lucky Crocker was there with me. Not gonna haul off and punch somebody when I’ve got him on my arm. What kind of impression would that make? Guy still thinks I’m cool as an iceberg in the artic and I want it to stay that way. Aradia’s supposed to be out for the night, sleeping over with some friend of hers. Thought I’d invite my hot date back home, see where things go from there.

\---

Kid’s plans fell through, had an awkward moment of explaining why I was coming in the door with my hands all over some guy she’s never met looking like a disheveled mess. That’s not my schtick and she knows it. Can’t stand rumpled business attire. She took it pretty well, though. Really hope I’m not fucking shit up as bad as some of the other dads I know.

March 22nd, 2009

I really need to start writing more often. This is starting to look like some kind of fucking dating journal. Guess that’s all that’s been going on with me lately. Same old same old on the job. I got the best kid, keeps her nose clean and her grades up. 

Deuce called today. Fuck if I could understand what he was going on about, though. Over-excited as usual. 

Reminder – don’t forget that goddamn paperwork. I hate filling out those shitty forms, but I’ve got to do it.

March 30th, 2009

Things are maybe heating up a little. Had a couple more mini-dates, nothing to really write about – Shit. This is a date journal now, isn’t it? 

He dropped a big one on me today. Invited me and the kid to his girl’s birthday party. Got two weeks to figure out what the hell to get her. Thinking classic film is a good route, what with our last conversation. My favorite well-dressed guy says to look for a detective with a mustache. Isn’t she a little young to be into that? Well, whatever. Gotta take his word on it.

Wondering how Aradia and her are gonna get along. Kid kinda keeps to herself. Does this stupid adventure thing with her buddies, but she’s usually out on her own. His kid strikes me as more of a girl that grew up playing house than a girl that went exploring. Are they going to be friends? Fuck if I can tell… I still know next to nothing about teenage girls.

April 4th, 2009

Found a good present. At least I hope it’s a good one. Got all the right elements, anyways. 

Maybe I won’t have to worry? Talked to the kid today. She mentioned that she’s got a friend that’s friends with the little brother of Crocker’s kid’s best friend? I don’t know. It’s getting too hard to keep track of. Can’t even keep track of the crazy names HER friends have, let alone someone else’s kid.

\---

Couldn’t resist. Got on Serious Business and had a ‘professional’ chat with PipeFan413. No fucking way did we violate the sanctity of our working-class dad’s messenger with double-entendres and innuendos. Completely innocent conversation about how I’d like to put some creases in _his_ pants.

April 7th, 2009

Gotta tell you, tie-shopping might be a strange date to some people, but it really turns me on. Plus the man really knows how to stroke his neck gear seductively. Getting all hot and bothered just thinking about it. Damn.

April 9th, 2009

Really proud of my kid. She decided to get the birthday a girl a gift from herself. Maybe she knows something I don’t know, but she picked up baking paraphernalia. Come to think of it, there’s some kind of baked-goods company with Crocker in the name, isn’t there? Crocker is a pretty common name though. Could be a coincidence.

April 13th, 20009

Holy shit. What the fuck was I ever worried about? Sat back and watched as our kids decided doing that role-play thing Aradia does was the best idea ever. Jane slapped on this weird little moustache and ran around playing detective while Aradia ‘saved the day’ with her adventuring skills. Can’t believe how quick they made friends.

\---

Helped clean up the party, got invited to stay over. Kids were pretty excited. Heard them giggling and telling stories at first. After a couple hours, didn’t pay much attention. Too distracted ‘ironing shirts’. Got a feeling this is the start of a beautiful thing.


End file.
